While humility and mutual accountability are essential, it is crucial to “put your hope in God” FIRST.
Not humans.
Not institutions.
Not programs.
You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your decisions and how you choose to live your life.
I understand this one thing about the algorithm: every like, every comment, every article, every second you spend on the videos or reels that pass your timeline, create patterns.
Your rants, your raves, your highlights, every one of those are stored.
I admire how one married celebrity shared that she and her husband separated for 6 months but nobody knew. THAT is a superpower.
What is more noteworthy is the fact that even when they separated, neither of them dated other people.
When they got back together for the sake of their child, they both admitted they had “no feelings” for each other anymore. Yet they decided to try again.
Today their marriage is much, much better. She’s humble enough to attribute it to the LORD – not because of a support group or any human being.
Don’t get me wrong. Sharing accountability, fellowship, and giving others the opportunity to bear your burdens with you is God’s design for His church.
However, will the people you share your burdens with truly pray for you? Or will they simply prey on your vulnerability?
The Bible says “Love protects”; “A wife must not separate from her husband”; “God hates divorce.”
How does a married person obey God when it becomes painful to stay?
If your marriage feels heavy today yet you desire to obey God, to “remain in Him”, this is for you.
If you’re feeling unloved, tired, unseen, unappreciated, disrespected, neglected and you think being away from your spouse, even temporarily, would help, this is for you.
“Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” 1 Corinthians‬ â€7‬:â€5‬ â€NIV‬‬
Pray FIRST. Then talk with your spouse.
Not your bestie.
Not your churchmates.
Not your family of origin.
Not your children.
And certainly not your in-laws.
Your spouse IS your primary accountability partner. Pray for each other, pray with each other. Communicate.
NEVER disclose your marital issues to anyone outside of it, especially on the internet space because the devil feasts on the algorithm.
Protect your spouse even when you’re annoyed. Zip your lips when you have nothing good to say about him or her. Your husband or your wife is NOT your enemy.
Put your hope in God! In Him, you never have to suffer alone.
God’s love protects you. His love disciplines you. His love never fails and His love clarifies His design: what God has put together, let no man separate.
Let’s pray.
Father God, when our marriage feels more like a bed of nails than a bed of roses, help us to trust that You have called us to keep our marriage bed pure and undefiled.
We acknowledge that You have put us together for Your purpose and Your glory. Protect us from pride and deceit and help us to love each other as You love us: faithfully, unconditionally, wholeheartedly. Though it’s a bit blurry, may our marriage be a picture of your covenant-keeping love with Your people. Help us to be humble. Help us to trust and serve each other, and may our children see, know and love Jesus through our lives. Your faithful love endures forever, Father God. Help us to enjoy Your love together. In Jesus’ name, Amen. Come Holy Spirit. Amen.